I am... OK

No baby news for me yet. Though every month that goes by I hear of another lucky cousin or friend.

At least I am starting to feel happy for them. Mostly. Sort of.

My Doctor is going to start fertility testing in two months if we haven't gotten pregnant by then. Funny that. The month I was due will be the month they begin looking in to why we are having such a hard time.


In other news, Todd might be getting an internship in another state this semester. This is good news, but we aren't sure how to proceed either way. He only has one semester left, and we just want to get. out. of. Idaho. So we don't know what to do... leave and then come back? Ew... Finish first then begin the hunt? It will be interesting to see how things pan out.


I am on day 5 of my fifth Master Cleanse. It has been my hardest so far and I don't know why. I want to eat EVERYTHING. Right now I am drooling for THIS. It will be on the menu for next week. Probably Monday. Yes. I have decided. Monkey, good thing you like avocados and garlic!


Our truck overheated while we were down in Utah last weekend. I have to take this Friday off just so we can be down there when a mechanic is available. Two things I want to know: how are we going to pay for this and why don't mechanics work on Saturdays???


I wrote a list of the things that I am not currently happy about. I also wrote an action plan on what I could do about each of those items. I like lists. It's what I do. I have started implementing some of my plan. It's two steps forward, and one step back.


We still can't pay rent next month, and I still don't know how things are going to work out. But they will. Somehow.


So, I am OK. For now. I need to just breathe and get through these next five days.

'Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button, girl.
So cradle your head in your hands
And breathe... just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe.